Men do not take directions kindly when driving.
This will not be news to you if you are a woman.
I'm not sure who is in charge in the Toyota factory, but someone with a surname like Toyota must be having a good laugh (or at least a demure chuckle, before apologising to co-workers for the noise) at shipping out zillions of Toyota Commuters to Australia with a "reversing device" to give direction. This charming appliance is mounted just behind the driver's ear, and the amplified accent of the tiny woman who lives in there (without complaint, I should add) could only be described as Seppo. As in Septic Tank. As in ... you know.
Anyway, Dave was reversing the caravan into the shed. Jackson was giving directions on one side, Pap and Angus on the other, and the tiny American reversing assistant was shouting above them all:
"2.4 metres. 1.2 metres. You are in mortal peril. YOU ARE ABOUT TO CRASH. 0.3 metres to impact. I TOLD YOU NOT TO COME THIS WAY. CRASH! CRASH!" *
The tiny American lady is now living on the windowsill in the kitchen.
I will therefore be only driving anti-clockwise around Australia. Forwards. That's all I'm saying.
*These may not have been her actual words.
Stay tuned ...
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